Flying With an Infant

As if merely taking a baby out in public wasn't challenging enough, try traveling with one! Actually Eddie was quite a good little traveler, it was just a logistical challenge. In this post I'll describe the trials and tribulations of travelling with a 6-week-old baby, and I'll save the details of our actual vacation for the next post.

We flew Southwest as usual. I used the SuperShuttle van service, which I highly recommend, to get to the airport, as I did not feel like driving to the airport at 4am then paying to park for 6 days. The driver and I had some difficulty installing Eddie's car seat but we eventually figured it out. I used the curbside check-in service and checked Eddie's car seat and Snugrider. I carried Eddie in his Moby Wrap, put the diaper backpack on my back and rolled a small suitcase full of everything that wouldn't fit in the backpack. After showing Eddie's birth certificate and obtaining his Boarding Verification Document and my boarding pass, we were ready to embark on this journey.

Of course we had to go through security before getting to the terminal, and I foolishly chose to take Eddie to the restroom and change his diaper first. By the time we left the restroom the line at the security checkpoint was a mile long! But the people around us were really nice, and one gentleman lifted that dastardly suitcase onto the conveyor belt for me. That left me free to fish out my ID and boarding pass, which I'd forgotten about since I was so consumed with getting my expressed breast milk and quart-size bag of liquids and gels past the TSA staff. And wouldn't you know it, they barely gave either item a glance! I was half-expecting them to test my diaper ointment and hand sanitizer for explosives and possibly put me through a cavity search. Not that I'm complaining. One funny thing - the TSA lady didn't notice Eddie's documentation, just my name on the boarding pass, so she asked "Is his name Chloe too?"

We got to the terminal in plenty of time for me to feed Eddie and myself before boarding the plane. A flight attendant immediately offered to help put my suitcase in the overhead, for which I'll be eternally grateful. I managed to snag a window seat next to an empty middle seat so I could lift my armrest and create some extra hip room. The gentleman on the aisle was polite but quiet, trying to get work done on the plane, so after a while I felt extra brave (not to mention engorged) and decided to try pumping some milk with my wonderful new Medela Swing. I got set up quite discreetly and hit the power button, only to discover the batteries had died. Doh! I'd only used this pump once before so I'm assuming the power button went on & off when it was jostling around in the diaper bag.

We had to change planes in Philadelphia, and we had about an hour layover between flights. I figured this would be plenty of time to find a ladies' room, change Eddie's diaper, and either breastfeed him or buy some batteries for the pump... Wrong! Due to ongoing construction at Philadelphia Airport we had to go through an unsecured area to get from Terminal D to Terminal E, which meant we had to go through security AGAIN. This sucked! I was already feeling stressed from going through security in Nashville, plus my boobs were really starting to hurt and I had to pee and I wanted to change Eddie's diaper before we got on our next plane. And of course the TSA guy made me feel like some kind of cretin because I couldn't put away my ID and boarding pass and bag of liquids & gels AND take off my shoes in one fell swoop. Sorry buddy, I grew a child inside my body, not an extra pair of hands outside it! I was so flustered by the time I got past the metal detector that I left my suitcase on the conveyor belt! Luckily a nice gentleman behind me in line managed to catch up to me with the suitcase very quickly. I met a few angels on this trip...

Once I had my shoes back on I checked the time, realizing that we had 25 minutes before our flight took off. Yikes! Thanks a lot, City of Brotherly Love, for sucking away 35 minutes of our lives that we'll never get back. I got to the ladies' room, managed to pee and attempted to breastfeed Eddie while sitting on the toilet, which lasted about 5 seconds because neither one of us could get comfortable. (Yes, I know there are bathrooms on airplanes, but they are not designed for people with substantial asses. Neither are the aisles for that matter.) Checked the time again and realized I wouldn't have time to change Eddie's diaper. That didn't exactly me feel like mother of the year! I did have a bottle for him however, so he wasn't going to go hungry, and I had just enough time to stop at the sundries shop for AA batteries before getting in line.

We boarded the flight without incident and a nice man put my suitcase in the overhead for me. Shortly before takeoff a flight attendant informed me that I couldn't have Eddie in his carrier during takeoff and landing "for security reasons." Apparently somebody at Southwest, or perhaps at TSA or FAA, feels that parents should have both hands on their baby during takeoff and landing. That would make it awfully hard to put on our oxygen masks should a need arise, but whatever, I'm no aviation safety expert. We took off and landed without incident, and I managed to pump a little milk so my breasts weren't aching quite so much. And once again Eddie slept through most of the flight, so nobody gave me any crap about him. In fact he received several compliments, both for his behavior and his cuteness.

Rich's stepfather met us at Manchester Airport. Our Snugrider came through the baggage claim right away, and we grabbed the car seat next to it, only to realize it wasn't my car seat. Oops! So we put it back on the belt and I described Eddie's car seat to How, so he could watch for it while I changed the diaper. I expected third-degree diaper rash burns by this time but Ed was fine. He did celebrate this temporary "freedom" by peeing all over the place, so I had to change his clothes too. This made the quick diaper change take about 20 minutes and I kept apologizing to the moms in line behind me who wanted to use the diaper changing station, but they were all really nice about it. They were veteran moms who understood. By the time I got out of there How had located Eddie's car seat and we were ready to roll. I'll blog further about the visit in my next post.

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Cut to 6 days later. My brother Randy drove us to Manchester Airport, which is about 10 minutes from his house. This time I decided to check my suitcase, and I was all set to pay the $25 extra baggage fee, but they counted the car seat and stroller frame as one item so I didn't have to pay the fee. That made me very happy! Also I left my winter coat behind, since I've never worn it in Tennessee and the next time I wear it will probably be next winter so he can meet me at the airport with it. That made one less cumbersome thing to drag around. A very nice woman helped me get Eddie out of his snowsuit while we were waiting in line, that made things much easier. And this time I was smart enough to change Eddie after going through security. Good thing, because he chose this moment to kick off the Peepee Teepee and peed all over himself, so I had to change his clothes too. Fun fun...

Once he was changed we had very little waiting time before our flight was called. A couple of flight attendants came by to coo over him, which was very nice. This kid's fan club grows every time we leave the house! We didn't have to change planes this time but we did stop in Baltimore before continuing to Nashville, and that gave me an opportunity to change his diaper again without risking him peeing on anybody - how mortifying would that be? Eddie slept for most of the trip but unexpectedly woke up and got fussy shortly before we landed in Nashville. Fortunately I had a bottle and a pacifier at the ready.

When we got off the plane the flight crew had our stroller and car seat waiting for us, which was wonderful! And a nice flight attendant unfolded the stroller for me without my having to ask - also a great customer service move. Rich met me at the baggage claim, we collected my suitcase and got Eddie back to the car without any issues. Once again, as much as I miss New England, when I travel without Rich I miss him more. And Eddie was very happy to see his Daddy!

In summary, these are Chloe's Travel Tips for Flying Alone With a Baby:

• Get through security first, then check the baby's diaper!
• Use a front carrier to get your baby around. This is a must! It frees up your hands to fish for your ID, boarding pass, cash, etc. Of course you'll need to take the baby out during takeoff and landing but it's fine for the rest of the flight, and for getting around the airport.
  
• Wear slip-on shoes. Check your sneaks or snow boots or whatever else. It's worth the time and effort you save by not having to tie your shoes while juggling an infant and whatever else you're carrying.
  
• If you're breastfeeding, bring a manual or battery-operated breast pump and pack it in the diaper bag. This is less about feeding the baby than about your physical comfort. Going 5-6 hours without nursing or pumping is gonna hurt! If you use the battery-operated kind, leave the battery compartment empty until it's time to pump. And pack extra batteries!
  
• If your baby likes pacifiers, put one on a string with a clip and clip it to your shirt or your front carrier. You don't want your baby wailing because he or she spat out a $3 piece of silicone and wants it back!
• Speaking of pacifiers, you definitely want your baby to suck on something during takeoff and landing to equalize the pressure in his or her ears. A pacifier or bottle is great for that. If you breastfeed and are comfortable doing so on the plane, I've heard that also works well and will comfort your baby. In a pinch, have the baby suck on your finger.
  
• Just because you can bring one carry-on and one personal bag onto the plane doesn't mean you should. Put everything you need into a generously-sized diaper bag and check the rest.
• Don't let the 3-1-1 rule freak you out. Obey it, of course, but in all likelihood they're not going to check your bag of toiletries for traces of explosives. At least they didn't with me. They just had me put the baggie in the plastic bin with my cell phone and shoes, and barely glanced at it. Same thing with the breast milk I brought along. Get your ID and boarding pass out first, worry about the other crap later. And speaking of liquids and gels:
  
• You don't need to put things like travel-size shampoo in your carry-on because you will not need them on the plane! If they lose your checked luggage you can buy shampoo when you land. If you're stuck in the airport for 3 days and have to wash your hair in the bathroom sink, you won't care what brand you're using. Use the 3-1-1 rule for things like diaper ointment and hand sanitizer, maybe some Mylicon drops for gas or saline drops for stuffy noses. You won't need any other liquids or gels during your flight.
• Pack enough diapers for 2-3 days of being stuck in the airport in an emergency. If you're stranded longer than that I'm sure the airline or TSA or the Red Cross will hook you up. Unless you're traveling to a third-world country, chances are there's a supermarket or Walmart or someplace else to buy diapers when you reach your destination. And in all likelihood you'll run out at some point on your trip anyway.
• Pack a baby nail clipper in your checked luggage or plan to buy one during your visit. It's amazing how much their nails grow in just a couple of days!
  
• Lastly, remember that there are nice people out there. Flight attendants, fellow passengers, and most TSA employees are human beings too. A lot of them are parents and know how it is, and the ones who don't have kids generally have at least one child in their life who they love. They get it.
  

The Journey Home... and Back... and Other Stories

That's what I'll be calling my anthology if I ever get around to amassing one.

I flew home the last weekend of September. Specifically I flew Southwest from Nashville to Manchester NH with a changeover in Baltimore. I'd been scheduled for an earlier flight that was overbooked, and they were taking volunteers to be bumped in exchange for a voucher for the price of that day's flight plus $100. Can you blame me if I took it? The change in itinerary was relatively painless, as it only made me about 20 minutes later than planned. The only problem was squeezing my big ass into my seat. They do not design airplane seats for pregnant women, especially the ones who were large to begin with!

But I survived and got to Manchester in one piece. Randy & Alayna kindly picked me up at the airport and put me up for the night. Of course I'd barely managed any sleep the night before and was pooped from the flight, but the fresh air perked me up from comatose to loopy. (Sorry if I said anything weirder than usual guys!) We hung out at their place for a few hours and I got to play with their dogs, Maggie and Sam, and their doggie cousin Isobelle. Their cat Buffy said hello to me too. Later that night we returned Izzy to her parents' house in Malden, and I got to see Paige and Sylvie, which was wonderful. Sylvie had her heart surgery a few days before but you'd never know it! After hanging out for a while and picking Paige's brain about mommy stuff, we went to Bertucci's for dinner. There's a dearth of decent Italian food in Nashville and I needed some chicken marsala like nobody's business!

The next day Randy & Alayna drove me down to Lynn for the baby shower. Peggy, my future mother-in-law, did a wonderful job organizing the shower and making lots of good food for everybody. My mom secured the function room at the senior housing development she used to managed (she just retired) so we had a free place to host it. We had a real good turnout, about 30 friends and relatives, and it was so great to see everybody! Of course it was a little overwhelming to sit and open all those presents while everyone else watched. Normally I only open that many gifts at Christmas when everyone else is opening theirs too... but I got over it. We were given all kinds of things that we need and want for the baby. I probably won't need to buy him clothes till kindergarten! Later that night I got all teary-eyed talking to Rich, telling him how much everybody loves us and our baby. Words can't begin to express our gratitude for such an outpouring of kindness and generosity. Me at the shower with my pregnant belly:


And this is me with Peggy, my wonderful mother-in-law-elect:


I spent the next few days at my mom and Mary's. They've turned my old bedroom into a den with a twin sofabed, which was perfectly comfy to sleep on. We had some nice quiet times hanging out, and I got to visit my favorite local eateries, Brothers Deli and Gulu-Gulu Cafe. And I taught Mary a few things about baseball. Wednesday morning I had an appointment in Salem, then I had lunch at Beer Works and went for a walk downtown. I made the mistake of going into a posh baby & maternity boutique and bought a little white baby hat. It cost about 5-10 times what I would normally pay but it is so soft and fuzzy and warm, it'll be perfect for the winter. And the saleswoman told me it was handmade by a woman in Soho - at least I'm not paying through the nose for sweatshop labor! As long as Rich doesn't see the price tag we're good. I also bought Zorro a new collar at the local pet boutique (Salem is so gentrified these days). It's blue like his eyes, and has rhinestones and a little bell. It's beautiful and Zorro deserves it.

Thursday afternoon I met Peggy at the mall. We went crib shopping at Sears, Babies R Us, Baby Depot and WalMart, in that order, before deciding on the crib and changing table set we'd seen at Sears. We decided Peggy would order the set later, because we were both pooped and she still needed to bake a birthday cake for How, Rich's stepfather. Later that afternoon we visited with Rich's grandfather, which was fun. Gramp is a "tough guy" type with a big heart, and I just adore him. Then we had How's birthday dinner at home and watched the Red Sox win. Good times. A few days later Peggy went back to Sears to order the crib we liked, and it was discontinued! Oh well. I picked a different set from another store, hopefully that one will be in stock and arrive before the baby does.

Friday afternoon I stopped by my old office to say hello to my former boss. It was nice to see her, it had been a while. That night I went into Boston. First I went downtown to Borders to buy thank-you cards for all those shower gifts, then bummed around Faneuil Hall for a while before meeting up with my friends for dinner. It was Isabel, Melissa, Cheryl, Cymara & Dan and their little girl Clarissa. We went to G'vanni's in the North End. It's a little pricier than my usual dining haunts but how often am I in Boston? The food was excellent and we all had a great time hanging out. After dinner I insisted on stopping at Mike's Pastry for some cannoli and noted with interest that they ship nationwide. Mmmmmm....

Saturday afternoon we went to my mom and Mary's wedding. The wedding was small, about 15-20 people, and they held it in the same place as my baby shower. They had a justice of the peace who did a wonderful job. Randy and I each read a beautiful passage about marriage and love. Here they are exchanging vows:


See? Two women getting married. Did anybody's eyeballs burn out in their sockets? Nah...

It was a quiet, dignified ceremony followed by a fun and relaxed reception. Everyone had a good time. What I'd love to see is for the other 49 states to make same-sex marriage legal, but that's another topic for another post. Here's a shot of the happy couple and their guests:

Standing, Left to Right: Theron, Sylvie, Paige, Randy, Judy, Alayna, Karen, Bob, GayGay, Joanne, Fred, me, Lorna's partner (forgot her name!), Lorna, Rose, Frannie.
Seated: Mary and Susan (my mom)

After the wedding I went back to New Hampshire with Randy & Alayna. We had a quiet dinner and hung out with the doggies. The next morning they drove me back to Manchester for my return flight. This one stopped in Baltimore before continuing to Nashville so I didn't have to change planes, made my life easier. It was gray and drizzly when we left Manchester, and it was such a trip to break through that low layer of clouds up to blue skies and sunshine! When we got close to Nashville I was able to spot some now-familiar landmarks. I even recognized my subdivision - it's pretty close to the airport so we were flying low by then but it was still fun. The boy sitting next to me recognized the field where he played Little League. Cute!

Our flight got in about 20 minutes early - gotta love Southwest - and Rich was waiting for me by the baggage claim. I gave him a big hug and kiss, I'd missed him! Of course I miss Boston too but I guess home really is where the heart is, and my heart belongs to that truck driver of mine. The icing on the cake? Parking at Nashville Airport for 45 minutes cost him $1.50! Would have been at least $20 at Logan. Sometimes the cost-of-living difference really is worth it.