My Man's Got Bad Pet Karma (Warning: possible TMI post)

This happened a couple weeks ago while Rich & I were housesitting for my cousin Paige and her husband Theron in Malden. We like to help them with the house when they're out of town because their dog Isobelle, aka Izzy, is a sweet, outgoing, energetic beagle who's a lot of fun. Plus their cat Smudge is the prettiest, sweetest little kitty in the whole wide world. Awwww!!!

Anyway, Rich's sister Emily flew home from her spring break softball tournament in Florida, and we volunteered to pick her up from the airport that night, because we're good like that. (Coincidentally this was the same night Ayla Brown flew back to after being voted off from American Idol, and Rich later ran into the camera crew covering her arrival.) We decided to bring Izzy along in case of any flight or traffic delays, because she doesn't like being alone in the house for too long. When we got to TF Green I took Izzy for a quick walk, bagged her doggie poo, and put her back in the truck with Rich while I looked for a trash can to dispose of the bag. I got back to the truck to find Izzy settled on Rich's lap in the drivers seat, which was soooooo cute! Wish I'd had a camera...

So we're sitting there listening to the radio and petting the doggie when Rich feels something wet on his leg. Turns out Izzy had secreted some fluid from her anal glands, and Rich now had a nasty-smelling wet spot on his leg! The odor was really gross, worse than the smell Izzy had sustained in a recent encounter with a local skunk. (Two encounters in one week, actually. Some dogs just don't learn.)

Meanwhile, Rich was fretting the wet spot on his jeans, thinking it looked like he'd peed himself - not a good look in front of airport security. So with Izzy banished to the backseat and the windows down to get rid of the essence des glands anals, Rich turned on the heat, wriggled out of his jeans, and held them in front of the air vent to dry the spot. Within minutes the spot was dry, Rich put his pants back on and all was well. But you must realize this is the same strait-laced guy who freaked out once when I changed my clothes Catholic school-style in his truck, much later in the evening, in a much less busy area! I started laughing my ass off and asked him, "Before you met me, would you ever have had occasion to take your pants off in an airport parking lot?" He had to admit that he wouldn't have. This is the effect I have on normal people.

Later that night I woke to find Smudge, the aforementioned sweet kitty cat, had jumped up on the bed. She came up to me purring her little heart out, letting me pet her, and walking back and forth across the bed like cats often do. After a few minutes she started to make that signature noise cats make when they're about to barf up some undigested kibble... and barf she did, right on poor, unsuspecting, fast-asleep Rich! (Technically she did it on the blanket, not directly on Rich's body, but close enough.) Yikes!

Being my loving and altruistic self I gently removed Smudge from the bedroom, gathered up some Kleenex and cleaned up the mess. With three cats at home I'm pretty used to it. Unfortunately Rich woke up during the cleaning process and was about to roll over when I cautioned him not to move. And of course I had to tell him why he had to stay still.

Oh, and the next morning after we gave Izzy a bath to remove the anal gland smell and the leftover skunk smell, she threw up a mix of water and tomato juice onto the bathroom floor. Talk about the piece de resistance!

And yes, we'll be sitting for Izzy and Smudge again soon. Because this is how much we love them and their human family. Either that or we're suckers. Can't decide.